The view from the grain silo's

Sitting on the top of block 3 from the grain silo's, I'm looking through the open window. The window has a little metal grid in front of it, which devices the view in small squares from 2 by 2 centimetre and it makes me think of the view from a prison cell. I see the blue sky and ocean, I can even smell the ocean. But I'm in this dusty room waiting for the next truck to come, so I can direct the grain in the right silo. I'm thinking that I should feel bored at this moment. It's early in the grain harvest season and most of the time I'm waiting. I can't do anything else then just standing here, sweping the floor and looking out of this window. Yet I don't feel bored at all, I feel alive, energised and I have a big smile on my face. During the last two weeks I've been thinking a lot about freedom, what does it mean? How do people reach it or try to reach it.
I noticed that freedom is nothing more then a state of mind. A prisoner can be free, while a millionaire can be a prisoner of the mind. So many people live their life covered underneath a layer of dust, bended under the pressure of society. I see it every day on Facebook, hear it in WhatsApp, people live under pressure. Mostly the pressure they put on themselves to try to live up to the expectation they think other people have from them. Just to be good enough. But that's just bullshit!!! Really it is.
I got a message from a friend who is really emotional last month's. So much pressure from herself on herself to do everything well. To learn/know everything immediately, to be there for everybody always. Not knowing how to say no, to set boundries, to create space for herself and to enjoy all the small things in life. The need to become better, to not make mistakes, to be a good partner, creates a pressure on herself which slowly strangling her. The only thing she wants, is to do everything okay. But what is OK? What is good enough? When is it enough? I don't belief it can ever be necessary to create a surrounding which is so hard on yourself that you almost suffocate. Yet more and more people are suffocating themselves, getting burn outs, depressions, anxieties and other breakdowns.
People I know are using drugs, living for the weekend. Not enjoying their job, not being able to find a job suited for their education. They're giving up dreams, ones so creative and bright, now deeply sad and not even willing to admit it to themselves. Not willing to take a step to create a difference. To scared to be a failure. To scared of the unknown.
Deep within they know this is not what they'd wish for when they where growing up. They're not making the first step to make a change. I wish I could help, but I can't.. I need to be real with myself, otherwise I'll start suffering even more from their behaviour. It hurts, but that's okay, I hope they'll wake up soon and get that light back in their eyes, the light of being alive, of being loved and loving.
The lessons everybody needs to learn, will learn them. It's just a matter of time, in this life or the next. I realise that it's heavy when someone puts a lot of energy in a study and can't find any job in that direction, but honestly see it as an opportunity, have a look in the world. See what's there, enjoy a sunrise, communicate with the mountains, cuddle a tree. The world is so big and so amazing, we don't have to become anybody more then what we already are at this moment.

My life was always focused on others. Becoming a teacher, a life coach, a yoga teacher, reiki practitioner. All the time when I was doing stuff, even when I was doing it for myself, something in me was looking how to teach this to others as well. Who could benefit from this knowledge.
The biggest realisation is that I don't have to do that at all. That I can live, travel, be, without the need to prove anything to anybody.
I am, and thats more than enough, that's everything.

This inside is so much more profound than it sounds like!! It gives me the freedom to do and to be who I want in every moment. It sets me free from so many fears and needs.
I am, that's the only thing that is left. Nothing has to do with what I have, do or give in order to be. This is one of the things I learned during my Essence training, but now 3 years later I had the experience which created the deeper understanding. I will fall back, probably a million times, but this deep wisdom is part of me from now on! And nothing can change that.